August 8th

​It has been over a year since I have written on this blog- but I thought this week would be the perfect time to write a post since technically this is the last time Carly will be sitting across from me at the bistro table as a single lady. Our very own Carly is marrying her love Kaleb this coming weekend. In what could  be a normal weekend to anyone else- August 8th will always be written on their hearts.

I can only imagine what this week leading up to the wedding must be like. Scratching off last minute to do items, soaking up time with family and friends, and trying to figure out how to balance any emotions that pop up along the way."Should I be more excited? Should I be more nervous? Should I be nervously-excited? "

There is so much built up excitement and normalcy all within the same week. With so many different reactions/milestones/ prep on social media nowadays it is easy to compare what your time before a major milestone in life should be like. Amidst all that- I hope Carly and Kaleb both know this is what they have discerned, prayed for, prepped for and worked for. All the Facetime calls, all the surprise visits, going on a trip to Africa (yeah.....), tests and tests, the bar exam, stress of school on both accounts, and being there for family members who have been in the hospital. You both have been through it all and are so very ready for this next step.

Even though part of me is crushed we will never be roommates again (Thank you University of St. Thomas for such a fun May!) -- I know from my time living with this girl that Kaleb could not have asked for a better partner in life. She always tries to do better for herself and those around her, is the best elementary school teacher a kid could ask for (Kaleb will receive lots of information about kids and school reform), personality tests will be filled out multiple times for each child they have as the kids go through the phases of life, and a new fad will be always waiting around the corner to try. (Hello flax cookies! Kids: Do not try this at home). She continues to challenge me to grow as a person  and always is the most fun sidekick to laugh with, dance silly with, and just be with.

I cannot wait to be part of the ride as their train is just taking off. My heartfelt prayer is that the two of you will enjoy all the sudden stops, drops, and climbs while going around the track of life. Every stage will be beautiful and I am so excited to be able to enjoy the ride.


Thank you both for saying yes to a beautiful but trying vocation. The world needs you both as a couple. We all love you. Your friends and family are praying for you this week leading up to the big day.

Cheers!! Let's get Carly married.

Because It’s Funny- Communication 

 -Because I have obviously been terrible at this concerning our Blog…

      -It seems like such a simple thing
     -It takes a life to master (at least I think so)

This was not my major in college. I don’t really know how beneficial it would have been anyway. I understand the concepts; the execution is what gets a bit messy. Why are there so many scary emotions that arise when we are asked to be vulnerable? What does that even mean, vulnerable? Well, my handy dandy right click synonyms feature tells me susceptible, weak, helpless, defenseless, and exposed. All sound terrifying. If we were speaking in the physical sense, I believe my brain would trigger our instinctive the fight or flight reaction. However I know from experience and beautiful speakers like Brene Brown (http://www.ted.com/talks/brene_brown_on_vulnerability) that vulnerability is the only way to true freedom and happiness.

Even after repeated hurt and disappointment we can choose to forgive again and again. That level of trust and courage to try again is what we find inspiring in so many of our heroes. Take for example Ms. Honey, from Matilida. Even though her childhood was tortuous and abusive, she chose to love and not allow bitterness or a hardened heart to dictate her whole life. Her bravery dramatically changed the path of another, Matilida, and at the same time, helped to heal Ms. Honey.

As a teacher, I think Ms. Honey is the bomb. But we all look up to characters like her, because we yearn for that same openness, even in the face of fear. That’s what makes life an adventure.

I never had a Agatha Truchbull in my childhood. In fact I’d rate my adolescent years as above average. I’ve also been enormously blessed by strong supportive relationships in my young adult life. However, I still feel my heart retract back in fear at the unknown future. Curling into a miniscule existence when I realize how enormous, uncertain and unpredictable our world and our people really are. I’m terrified at my own weakness and frail humanity. If I struggle and fight with changing my own faults and failings, I am even more helpless to change others. In the chaos of all this, a deceptive fear creeps in to steal my joy. Change is great for uprooting questions and fears that might not be easily identifiable, and even more difficult still to wrestle.

Communication, vulnerability, and an honest openness are the only guides I know along the path out of that chaos. Not even out, but through, or within the mess; the only thing that makes the wreckage worth trudging thorough.

I try to teach my first graders to talk about their feelings. To let others know when they are hurt or sick or feeling lonely. I explain it’s what friends do, it’s how we make peace, and it’s what Jesus would want (benefits of a Catholic School!). And then I step back and laugh at how many adults (myself included) can’t or don’t do that. We get hurt or scared or sick (of someone) and expect them to read our mind, or ration that talking it out with others will somehow remedy the issue.

Most of the time, I think this comes from a lack of perspective, understanding or fear of having to admit our own failing in the problem or a lack of love. Love can fix it all, for sure.

Love is the cure. It is the antidote for our fear-ridden world and our fear-ridden hearts.

Haha and even after reading this back over, I don’t know if I clearly communicated what I wanted to. But I’m trying to and I’m learning too, and maybe that’s the most important part anyway. 

Oh yes, and side note/HUGE note and HAPPY note. I'm engage now (if you are reading this you probably know already). He is handsome, brilliant, faithful and good and I'm one happy gal! 

Till next time, 

Carly Rose 

Seeing God's Goodness

Hi friends!!

How are you? I hope you are doing so well. Sorry some time has passed since we last spoke. I feel like that is usually the first line or two in Mine or Carly's posts but thanks for being an avid reader of this little slice of heaven in the World Wide Web. It's funny how places, people, and situations end up taking a big place in your heart when you least expect it. This little blog always seems to do the same. Our love for the little things is definitely not a coincidence for a theme of this blog ;)

For some of you who know me best, you could probably get a hunch some of the aforementioned blog post to "drive out fear" was directed at me. I wish I could say otherwise- but it's true. To be honest- for the longest time I never really knew I did that. Living in fear. Being fearful or unsure was just a natural inclination from growing up I had no clue I had hardened my heart so much.

Seeing the beauty of the Cross to unharden hearts.

I've been reading though- a great book called ' Consoling the Heart of Jesus'.  So much of the book focuses on His heart and not our own. It has been so refreshing to read. One of the points that drove home for me was the part about a hardened heart.  It can be so easy to close our hearts off to others ; to let the fear keep us from living a truly full life. But when we do this- we close off the opportunity to invite The Lord and others in, and then have an inability to truly see the gifts God sends us every day.


Snow in Dallas!

Now, by no means am I an expert at driving out fear at all at this point. But, by focusing on the heart of God's mercy I can trust He will always be with me in every step. Not promising suffering won't come my way, but instead guiding me and loving me in each moment when I am in the joys and tough times in this Life. Only love from above can un harden our hearts.  

So for February my goal has been to see something beautiful each day by writing down when I saw God's goodness in my life. Knowing He is here with me helps me to let go of this fear that I am so tired to call a companion of mine. While fear I'm sure fear will try to creep in sooner rather than later I am thankful for this gift of feeling liberated from it by consoling the Lord's heart which has been pierced. What is there to fear when the Maker of our hearts is in control of our lives?

From the Diary of St. Faustina which the book quotes:

"You should not worry too much about adversities. The world is not as powerful as it seems to be." (1643)

"Mankind will not have peace until it turns with trust to My mercy"

Here is to seeing His goodness and leaving an old friend 'Fear' at the door.

Until next time at the little bistro set.

Cheers,

Elizabeth

Driving Out Fear

First of all it's been entirely too long. And that is completely my fault. Hopefully we can pick back up where we left, as old friends do. I can't begin to catch up on all the happenings since November, so I'll begin with the present. Last week one of the readings from mass was 1 John 4:18 "there is no fear in love". This message has always stuck with me, and in a lot of ways puzzled me. In my experience there is plenty to fear in love. In many cases, love is associated with fear, fear of suffering pain because of love.  Adele gets it as she beautifully belts "sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead". Hurts is a weak word for the pain I've both experienced and witness in others in the name of love. 

Good reminder in our newly remodeled house.  It's what gets us through. 

So then one has to ask, whats the remedy or root of this? Is is better to become a critique, a distant bystander that bitterly holds on to the memory of that pain as reminder to not wander of the road of safety? But, is that safe path really better? I am currently reading "The gift of Imperfection" and while many of the messages portrayed in this writing speak truth, one particular truth settled deep with me. It's the idea that you can't stifle one emotion, without stifling all. I can never live fully alive, or experience real love if I repress the pain, and at the same time, being closed to true vulnerability doesn't ensure a lack of pain, but promises a life of numbness. 

What I find interesting in myself and in some of my closest loved ones, is even in we understand this fact, living it out in day to day life and thoughts is all together different. If repression, fear and worry are our automatic responses and mindsets, even though we know happiness is the goal, anxiety and over-thinking is still the comfort zone. Happiness and venerability are unfamiliar and therefore feared. 

One of my favorite ways to clear my mind-running

The classroom of silence is a powerful place. Many people are so uncomfortable with silence maybe because there is a lot of unresolved issues in our hearts that easily rise up in a peaceful place, because they are contrary to the surrounding. In my experience it's a good indicator that I'm in need of healing when the silence becomes uncomfortable. In that space between the silence and our reaction we have a choice. That space is what separates people into those who strive to live fully alive and those who choose to ignore or skim the surface of whats happening within and ultimately in life. That space is powerful, because it gives us the chance to choose and maybe if we choose time and time again to be vulnerable, to resist the power of fear and the comfort of worry. To break the shell that makes us fearful of love. If we could allow our Father to wipe away the guilt and that voice telling us we are unworthy of love and unworthy of happiness, we can start to have room to listen to a different voice. One calling us to joy. Not to a life free of suffering but to a perfect love. A love that drives out fear. 

Beautiful place of silence at the Chapel of St. Basil

Sounds simple right? Probably not, but I'm going to keep trying it and your welcome to join the party :) 

Thanks for stopping by dear. Lets make this happen more. 

Take Care, 

Carly Rose 

Tis the Season to being Thankful

Hello, Dear Reader.

Yes, you. Thank you for reading this post. I am especially thankful for you. Whoever you are. Whether I know you personally (which I am guessing is a 99% possibilty) or you somehow stumbled across this post...(How'd you find us??) I am thankful for you. I am thankful we are able to walk these next few minutes together. Thank you for taking the time to read and experiece my journey for just a little. Even though this always is just a snippet of my life, I hope to bring some enlightenment to you and your day and that you find hope in my joys, laughs, and struggles. But, I'm being thankful on this today. So.. let's share in joy and laughs :) I thought with Thanksgiving being a week and a half away, I would come up with what I was thankful for. Since I am not in school and writing what I am thankful for has not been a lesson for me to do in a while (Carly, are you having your kids do this?), I thought it would be good for me to write this out for myself and for you since it helps me catch you up on how life has been !

1. I am thankful for traveling. I had the most fun traveling to Denver, Colorado and Houston, Tx over this past month. Have you ever been to Colorado before? It was my first time and I could not believe my eyes the entire time. The mountains were so glorious and majestic. There was even snow on the ground in the mountains in Breckenridge. Oh goodness. That town must be the cutest at Christmas. A literal winter wonderland. I want to begin planning my next trip out there... if only my hands were not cold in 80 degree weather in Texas I would want to call Colorado home. I think I would have to wear 20 lbs of extra layers just to stay warm. I don't think the winters there and I would get along. So, spring time? (Carly.. you in ? ;) ) These pictures do not even do the beauty justice.

2. Thankful for family. As I mentioned above, I was able to make the 45 minute flight home to Houston, Tx. I was so excited the entire flight because the weekend was going to be filled with Kristin's birthday, wedding dress shopping for her, time with my brothers, mom and dad, and Alex even made a trip in to celebrate. And alas, Carly King and I did not see each other. She was on her way to Boston! And we originally thought we would be in the same airport overlapping but turns out she was at Hobby and I was at Bush. #thestruggle Things turn out to be pretty funny. Ya know? But, I digress, this is a thankful post after all ;) My family is seriously the best. I have gone through so much with my siblings and it is so humbling to see what God has done and is doing.  And to see how there was a plan all along to bring us close together. Matthew and David's comedic acts don't hurt either to laugh at it all. I love them with all my heart and it had been since early June that we had all been together. It was much overdue. And in just over a week we will be together again! Months go by very fast nowadays...

3. Thankful for my dear friends. For my friends here in Dallas and ones that are far by distance, not by heart. Thank you for all the times we have had in the past and present. Thank you for continuing to be there for me and helping me to always become a better me. I love you all to pieces. To go on and on, I could. But you know who you are. And, I am so thankful for you.

4. Thankful for people's good nature in my life. Work has been a funny one, and I could not be more thankful for the two women I am working with right now. We are in a war room and I love the time together to laugh about life, talk about our own very different experiences, and getting to spend time with people throughout the day. There really are so many different paths in life. And whether my path with these women and those at my company will last months or years, it is nice to overlap for this time. We really do have the choice every day to make it the best one based on our attitude and we all have so much power to make another's day by smiling, talking, helping someone late at night, and being patient. You never know what will make another person's day.

5. Thankful for God's unwavering hand in my life. It is so easy for me to forget and overlook, but when I do look closely I know and can see Him guiding me every day in my work, relationships, and my own heart. I am thankful He continues to guide me even if I turn my head or am not seeing clearly what He is wanting to show me during this time in my life.

I am literally at a coffee shop so for that I am thankful. I am pretending you are sitting right across from me on that bench right there >>> Sorry. Hope the sun isn't too hot on your back.

What are you thankful for? I wish I could be talking with you right now. But, whenever you answer that question on your own, I will be pretending you are talking with me. Deal? So, I guess we can be in each other's journey a bit longer. I would like that.

Thanks for sitting across the bistro table from me,
Elizabeth

Still and Silent

Ma-Ra-Na-Tha…which means come Lord Jesus

I hope your drinking tea while reading this. It’s a soothing idea I’m sharing.

New additions to the list of things that make me sound like a hippie.

1.     I teach Christian Meditation to my first graders.

2.     I live in community with ten other teachers

3.     I hate going to the doctor

4.     Well I used to be a vegetarian

5.     I sometimes dress like a hippie

The list weakens rapidly, but I am excited for what meditation is doing for my students and in my life. I asked my kids today how their feelings toward meditation have changed since we began (about a month ago). Their answers were things like; “I like it”, “It’s gotten shorter”, “It makes me calmer”, “I can listen to Jesus”, and “It really is beautiful”. Say all those in the voice of a six year old and it will melt your heart. I attended a lesson called “How to Teach Christian Meditation” taught by two Australians who have implemented this practice across their entire district and have seen amazing results. However this whole idea is not result driven. It’s just a natural repercussion of teaching children to be silent. “Know thyself” is a simple yet powerful statement by St. Augustine. Silence is the perfect classroom for lessons in self-awareness, but more than that awareness of the presence of God within.

I have children in my class with anger problems, or situations at home beyond their control that have become more peaceful and reflective through meditating for only one minute everyday. The time frame for meditating s is intended to be the same number of minutes as your age. For adults it’s about 30 minutes max. I can get nowhere close to this. And to be honest I am much better at scheduling into my kids day than into my own, but it has definably served as a reminder and inspiration to allow for more solitude and reflection in my own life. To be still, and know that He is God, to know that He is God and loves you is where we find our identity and life source. This is by no means a self-help remedy or a one step solution to happiness. Just a simple thought from a simple first grade teacher on being still and silent.

Thanks for sitting across from me.

I hope this left you cozy and curious.

“And, behold, the Lord passed by, and a great and strong wind rent the mountains, and brake in pieces the rocks before the Lord; but the Lord was not in the wind: and after the wind an earthquake; but the Lord was not in the earthquake:

And after the earthquake a fire; but the Lord was not in the fire: and after the fire a still small voice.” 1 King 19: 11-12

Good To Me

Hi Friends!!

It has been awhile, hasn’t it. I have been missing my little space in the blogosphere. While I have been making up for my lack of writing by reading blogs (and sitting drinking tea), let’s try again at this little randevu.

Can I just be the first to say it:: (Or maybe, the second, hundredth, thousandth girl)…

I could not be more excited! Dallas has been gorgeous. Right now it is 70 degrees, breezy, and beautiful!

(My view on this gorgeous day so far). There just is something about this time of year that gets me super excited. It could be due to no longer getting long breaks off  (womp womp) so seasons become all the more special in the working world!! Except, when stores begin to jump ahead. While I do love snowmen, it is not even October yet. Let’s enjoy Fall first, pretty please!!

Besides being super excited and loving every possibility of being outside and enjoying this amazing
weather we have had, (and getting to wear scarves, smell cinnamon, and eat pumpkin!!!) here is a semi wrap up of what has been going on since the last time I wrote.

Work has been work to say the least. With anything, there are little struggles that pop up and
sometimes you get to a point that you say “but there is a whole WORLD out there” and I am sitting. In a cube. But, then, there are other days when you feel very good about the work you are doing and things just make sense. It’s all about the pluses and minuses and taking each day for each day. Remember how earlier I said I had been working on this? Progress!

These last weeks...months? (oh wow) have been incredibly blessed though and challenging and exactly what I needed. My life has consisted of tap dancing, yoga, young adults, Mass, prayer time, dinners, exploring, game watching, catching up, picnics, walks, coffee drinking, trying new eateries, meeting new people, and traveling to College Station. It has all been a whirlwind (an exciting one at that) after working hours. But,unfortunately, it can be too easy for me to forget all the good things and to look at very minute details of a job, the things that don’t make me the happiest, and struggling with “Is this really what I am supposed to be doing” . But, when I step back, and see ALL the great and beautiful things in my life all I can think of is Audrey Assad’s new song “Good to Me”. ( We are on an Audrey kick right now aren’t we Miss King?!)

Maybe you haven’t heard the song yet or do not like her music, but please just look at this one line at
least:

“I put all my hope on the truth of Your promise and I steady my heart on the ground of Your goodness”

For me, it can be very difficult to see the goodness of the Lord, as I too often fall into my own
melancholy. (Oh..I could talk about temperaments for DAYS. Next post. I am just about to finish the
book!) But, what a beautiful reminder to remember God is always there to help and not hurt us. To lead us to His heart. Yes, some days it is very easy to see the goodness and trust in God’s promises. But let’s try in those difficult times and days to not focus on the dreary but, instead, focus and see the very great things going on in our lives.

On some days, the only good things going on in the office world can be pretty funny. And I just have to laugh sometimes at Corporate America. So, in trying to see the good things in sometimes difficult days… let’s have a laugh at scenarios I have written down shall we?

1. Getting your own cube!!! (which is actually getting taken away to go back into a “war room” #techie
2. New designs on the Dixie cups?! Exciting! Good day.
3. Going for a walk outside during lunch! Gotta get that Vitamin D, sunshine, and fresh air. Also,
leads me back to the “There is a whole world out there!”
4. Being on someone’s water/coffee/tea cycle. You see them at the kitchen at the same time.
Good day. We are both like clock work.
5. Tea. Tea. Tea. (which explains why number 4 happens)

To good things, God’s goodness, and Fall!!!
And living moment by moment with this girl:

And to being better at this blogger thing.

Thanks for sitting across from me,
Elizabeth